It is not uncommon to hear about someone who is well known and has gotten themselves into big trouble. Whether it is a politician or a celebrity, and yes there is a difference, it is hard to believe how these people get themselves into such a mess. They seem to have everything going for them and then bam…. you wake up one morning and there is their prominent, but not necessarily flattering, mug shot displayed in the morning paper. What happened? How could this be true?
The first real fall from grace that I recall was when President Richard Nixon suddenly resigned from office amid the Watergate Scandal. We now know that he had a fairly lengthy list of things he was involved in that were probably based on some poor decision making. But, the comment that I heard most often when President Nixon resigned was not the comment that I expected to hear. The comments had little to do with his guilt or innocence. Most comments were something to the effect of …“Well, he just got caught. They all do it…he just got caught.” If you believed what you were hearing, his biggest mistake was in getting caught. Even after all that came out based on the investigation surrounding his presidency, many people still regard him as one of the best Presidents in our history. He just got caught.
This type of reaction surfaced again when President Clinton became involved in the Monica Lewinsky scandal. Once the news broke, we learned that much like the President Nixon situation, Monica may have just one of many unpleasant issues that Clinton was involved in. We sat and watched Senate and impeachment hearings where testimony was much more suited for an installment of Desperate Housewives than the leader of the free world. But, after all was said and done, and said and done again, a common response was very similar to the Nixon era. “Hey, he just got caught. All of them do it; he was just the one that got caught.” And despite all of this, much of which he finally admitted to, President Clinton is also regarded by some as one of the best presidents in our nation’s history. He just got caught.
First of all I hope that it is not true that “they all do it.” Whether it is incidents such as Nixon’s activity, or Clinton’s, or the countless scandals that have occurred in between, surely they don’t “all do it.” Surely, we are not being led politically or entertained by our celebrities by categories of the caught and uncaught. I have to believe that there are some out there who actually haven’t done anything that would get them caught. But, I have resigned myself to the fact that the category of the caught and uncaught outnumbers the category of the simply innocent by great numbers. And I begin to put this realization into perspective of how our general population fits into this process of caught, uncaught, and the justification and rationalization of both.
While we hear of stories each day that are much less severe than a Presidential scandal, the shock is sometimes just as great. It might be a friend, a family member, a religious leader or a community leader. People that you just did not expect to see one day on an arrest sheet. But there they are, with a look on their face that just screams out the obvious question, “how did this happen?” Are we shocked that they got into trouble or is it more so based on the more common caught/uncaught response? Everybody does it, they just got caught. Do we all really drive drunk, or use drugs, or shoplift, or molest children, or beat our spouses, or participate in any of the other activities that are deemed illegal in our society? Is it really just a matter of some of us being caught and some of us not? In many of these examples, to a large degree, I think there is some truth to this. I am certainly not saying that we all indulge in activities such as the examples above, but the acceptance of what is illegal or not, and what certain people believe should be or not can vary largely among certain people.
We are quick to talk about how stupid an athlete might be who gets caught drinking and driving, but will not hesitate to drive home from the sports bar where we heard the news, after having several drinks. We teach our kids to just say no and explain to them the dangers of drugs, but can’t wait to light up after the kids have gone to bed just to relax a little bit. We speak publicly about the harm that many of our social ills have caused to our society only to contribute to many of these ills within the confines of our homes. Does it make it okay to do these things as long as no one knows about it? Wait, would that mean that we are operating under the “those who just got caught theory?” That is an answer that each of us will have to make personally. Only you know for sure whether or not those things that you may be involved in are worthy of a mug shot photo one day. But in the mean time do us a few favors.
Number one, don’t condemn others for the very same thing that you do. Number two, don’t lean on the excuse that everyone does it. Everyone does not. And number three, please don’t display that look of surprise when the mug shot flash goes off. You may be sorry, but you should not be surprised. It may be true that there is only the caught and uncaught, which seems to be the common response to anyone who steps in a big pile. If it is true, one would assume that you could fall into either category very quickly. However, one may also assume that if you don’t hang around where these big piles lie, you are surely less likely to ever step in it. If you are interested in having Mr. Hall speak at your next club or group meeting, please email contact information to: stanhall@voice4victims.com Stan L. Hall
