Love is inexplicable. How do you put into words how you feel about the love of your life? How do you describe how a person can affect your heart? How do you measure and equate the depth and breadth of such feelings? How do we teach our children about love?
On July 28, 1928, my mother’s father, Louis Isensee, wrote the first of soon-to-be many love letters to my grandmother, Orvada Killion. The first of the hand-penned notes began with my most favorite line for a love letter, “My heart beat like a trip hammer this morning when the mail came in.” Now, if you have no idea what a “trip hammer” is, it’s a massive powered hammer that is used in agriculture, mining, or finery forges. The online videos are fascinating to watch. Each trip hammer bangs on grains, rocks, or metals to their own beat. I have always found it interesting that my grandfather chose to compare his heart to heavy machinery. However, they were his - determined, steadfast, and heavy-hitting.
Last month, during our road trip back from visiting my parents for the Christmas holidays, my husband, Jeff, and I discussed ‘love.’ While there’s the wooing or action-oriented part such as the cards, letters (emails/texts), roses, chocolates, champagne, and dating, there were more important aspects of connecting to the essence of someone else’s soul. Jeff described it as “intrinsic” and “inexplicable.” We both agreed that it’s the ability to see into the soul of someone and finding that connection – spiritually, emotionally, intellectually, and physically.
How do you choose to give your heart away and place it into the hands of another to be cared for in the good and bad times? I’ve heard a colleague describe love as a choice. Every day, she chooses to make the conscious decision to love her husband. On the other hand, we have all bore witness to masks of love in relationships where couples didn’t see or respect the value in each other, speaking to or about each other in actively or passively destructive manners. Research shows that a couple’s communication style can either kill the joy in their relationship or bond them, pulling them closer to each other. How do you choose to speak and act towards the one you love?
Love, it must be experienced and felt to be explained. It can sweep over you like a tidal wave, hit you over the head like a trip hammer, or it can be as subtle as a faint whisper in your ear. However love affects you, how you choose to describe and act on it is personal. Each person has their own description and experience for love – inexplicable love.
About Katie Hart Smith
Katie Hart Smith’s column, “From the Heart,” touches the heart, inspires, and entertains. Smith, a published author for over twenty years, believes that words, written or spoken, have power. To learn more, visit www. katiehartsmith.com.